bluefirebird: (Default)
bluefirebird ([personal profile] bluefirebird) wrote2011-12-26 10:55 am
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While I am working up the effort to post...

I'd like to say a thankyou to all my friends on here and on twitter (I'm struggling to keep up over there!) this year.

Thankyou for all your comments and support - my life is progressing in fits and starts at the moment and there are comments that I wanted to reply to and haven't worked up the effort to (I might, yet, you never know).

It has been a pleasure and an insight to know you all online - reading of other people's lives helps put my own into perspective better than much of the shallow contact I have with many of my RL friends.

Meeting Amy and Hanne (and Bunny) was a highlight of the year, I'm sorry it was only a flying visit.

May 2012 bring you all health and happiness and fulfilment of dreams.


.

[identity profile] taylorgibbs.livejournal.com 2011-12-26 12:52 pm (UTC)(link)
HUGS and thoughts!

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 09:53 am (UTC)(link)
Thankyou. *hugs back*

[identity profile] ferneberga.livejournal.com 2011-12-26 01:59 pm (UTC)(link)
May 2012 turn out better than 2011. You never know what's just round the corner.
Hugs

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:06 am (UTC)(link)
Thankyou.
But it's kind of difficult to imagine anything good/nice round the corner at the moment.

[identity profile] ferneberga.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:09 am (UTC)(link)
I can understand that. I believe it's common for people who've lost a loved one to feel like that.
You just take one day at a time, and if you can somehow manage to escape the parents and aunt for a week somewhere (anywhere), I'm sure it will do you the world of good.

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 11:22 am (UTC)(link)
It's not just having lost Pete, but I can't see things improving with my Dad - in fact the NHS has just made him many times worse this year (he wasn't incontinent before all the hospital stays, for starters). Mum needs to put him in proper care really, but she doesn't want him to go, and she's terrified of all the horror stories she seen and read in the media - not to mention the fact that the NHS hasn't been much better than that.
They'll have been married 59 years next month.

I am happy escaping to the sanctuary of my flat - with Tills - and don't have any desire to go anywhere else or leave her (I think she's got Dementia too, to be honest!) It's all the other stuff that I need to do that's a chore. Even my friends wanting me to "get out" is too much effort (although they have agreed to leave me be on New Year's Eve) - and I really need to get over to Pete's place and claim my stuff, what of his I want to keep and anything else before it all gets tidied into a skip. Trouble is, it's not my house to come and go as I please anymore...

[identity profile] ferneberga.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 12:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Sadly I'm not surprised at NHS' cockup with your Dad. My Dad fortunately is autonomous, mentally healthy but has his physical ailments, which are generally being made worse by the lack of interest shown by NHS even in terms of relief. The standard answer from the majority of the docs, is "what do you expect at your age?" to which Dad replies, "pain relief".
Are there no daycare centres for your Dad? The Basque health service for example has daycare centres for people like your Dad, which whilst not the best thing, it would give your mum some relief, and probably not worry her so much given the horror stories in the press.
Mine had been married 56 years before Mum passed away, which puts them in age group of the very elderly.
I think it's important to get out at least a couple of times a month even though you don't feel like it. Many people don't like New Year's Eve including yours truly. I've always found it depressing even before Mum passed away.
Do make sure to get your personal belongings from Pete's place mementoes of him asap, because the family will probably be wanting to clear the place out after the festivities.

Hugs

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:08 am (UTC)(link)
And, more importantly, how's your ankle?
Has Itsas forgiven herself yet?

[identity profile] ferneberga.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:11 am (UTC)(link)
Ankle's getting better slowly. Finally get to see osteologist tomorrow, hope I'll get a heel support or boot of somekind so I can hobble more decently and autonomously.

Not too sure if Itsas has forgiven herself yet or not, she still looks terribly upset when after asking for walkies I say we can't go, that she has to wait for one of my friends to come by - poor sod

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 11:23 am (UTC)(link)
Did I mention that my cycling friend was back on his bike after 6 weeks when he broke his ankle?
Saw him again yesterday, and he's progressing well.

[identity profile] ferneberga.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 12:15 pm (UTC)(link)
That's encouraging news. Hope I can say the same in a few weeks

[identity profile] onlyonechoice.livejournal.com 2011-12-26 04:41 pm (UTC)(link)
*many hugs* I hope 2012 brings you a little more peace and happiness.

take care.

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:10 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks.

Trouble is it's very difficult to imagine anything other than things getting worse before they get better - it's easier not to imagine.

[identity profile] ncis-love.livejournal.com 2011-12-26 06:42 pm (UTC)(link)
And I'm so glad I got to meet you as well. Hopefully one of these days we can plan a longer visit!

*hugs*

Thinking about you lots.

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:14 am (UTC)(link)
We need someone to invent the teleport!

It's not a good time for me to be travelling at the moment, what with my folks; but with family in Vancouver, cycling friends in Portland and you near Seattle, I think the reasons for suffering another transatlantic flight to the West Coast are growing. ;-)

Assuming immigration will let me in this time!

[identity profile] ncis-love.livejournal.com 2011-12-29 05:29 am (UTC)(link)
I'll put in a good word with immigration next time you suffer the long flight.

Otherwise, get cracking with that teleport!
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[identity profile] chirugal.livejournal.com 2011-12-26 09:30 pm (UTC)(link)
It was awesome to meet you. You've been in my thoughts this Christmas. <3

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:18 am (UTC)(link)
The worst bit is that I feel guilty being able to escape and leaving Mum in the shit (sometimes literally).
iamwintermute: (Default)

[personal profile] iamwintermute 2011-12-27 03:47 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs* thinking of you!!!

[identity profile] bluefirebird.livejournal.com 2011-12-27 10:18 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks. *hugs back*